So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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