8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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