he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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