He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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