it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Your cock deserves a montage
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
