She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
