I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
