So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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