you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
