Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Do you remember whose house we're in?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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