Me too!
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
