I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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