What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
