the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
