the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
high people should be assigned attendants
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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