how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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