I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i came on her dog
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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