im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
