it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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