Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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