okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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