'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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