Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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