So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
