He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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