apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
