Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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