we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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