my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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