Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
