I accidentally had phone sex last night
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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