Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
