Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
