shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
