Cold hands, warm shart.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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