God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
