He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
