i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
