hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
So. Much. Porn.
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