If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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