i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
