I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
