U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
