I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
