I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
