Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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