I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I think I just sharted jello shots
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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