I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
