super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I could fuck to npr.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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