he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Randomize
