You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
A+ Viking dick
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
